Ok hey guys, here's another piece of rambling for you guys (: Today's a very boring day and thanks to Shermaine who chatted with me for awhile if not I'd have died of boredom. While we were chatting, we somehow touched a subject on leadership. In my church, leaders first start of as being a potential and work their way up through God's grace to more bigger leadership roles. I myself am a potential and have been asked to consider taking on a leadership role. Not just yet lah but maybe in the future? Haha. In my first experience being a leader not too long ago, I have learnt and experienced so much about leadership just within a short span of 5 days. Thanks to my blogs unpopularity, I'm free to talk about my 'problems' in being a leader hehe (: You see, being a leader in camp means that I have to minister to the camp members, to pray for them and to help them with their doubts and stuff. To do that, usually someone would expect a person who is super mature, full of wisdom, plenty of experience, pure minded and such (not to mention old). The problem being, I'm practically none of that =X Haha I was 14 at that camp and was younger than almost all my group members. I don't have much knowledge about things like catching ppl wen dey get slain by the spirit, encouraging them and stuff. I am far from being mature as ppl will know and what the crap, I'm a person full of sin, overflowing with it even. Haha now even though I'm talking about 'spiritual' stuff for being a leader, I don't even have the worldly stuff to qualify for being a leader like having confidence (wahlao first day of camp was a disaster! I was like super quiet and left all the talking to my other leader =X), I don't look in ppl's eyes when talking to them (i don't keep eye contact lol). I'm very lazy and don't like to use my brain, I'd rather do the menial stuff that nonid think one and thats very unleader-like hahaha cause leaders are the ones who plan and think and leave the work to the 'lower rank' ppl. Yea so kinda get the picture now? I was pathetic in camp, really. Before camp I was not doing quiet time, living my life as a Saturday christian and stuff so when I entered into camp as a leader, I really had delimas (dno how spell =P) like should I go minister or should I join the altercall. Or if I choose to minister, how the hell am I supposed to pray for this guy when I myself if guilty of it and stuff. I really felt very troubled. Luckily my other leader, a more older and experienced one (Thank God for Carissa =D ) encouraged me saying that it is good in a way that i feel like that cause when God uses people, it is through God's grace that those who are broken with a heart of humility can be used to their fullest potential, showing the strength of God that there is no denying that it is His work. Cause there's this verse or song that goes smth like this: When we are weak, He becomes stronger. So its sorta like God can use our weakness to His advantage or smth lidat lah. My explaination sucks I know... even I can't understand myself a little haha but the underlying question is this, should I choose not to become a leader because of my human weakness? Or should I trust in God's grace and step out of my comfort zone? Haha this is a question that I will probably have to answer sometime next year so I'll have plenty of time to think it through (: like the previous post, I still have plenty of crap for me to crap about, but if I crap anymore, ppl will start dying of boredom like me hahaha so yea, I'll end off my blog here. Just drop some of your comments or suggestions at the tagboard if you have any won'tcha? (: